Tag Archives: death

Pink & Happy

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Pink and happy. That’s how I remember her, she loved pink and she was generally a happy person. For some reason I always remember her smiling or laughing, it’s like a dream sometimes, one of those vivid dreams where you almost believe it’s real. And I sometimes wish it was.

It’s been three years since it happened, but it still seems like yesterday that I received that call. It was like in the movies or soap operas, you know, when they receive “the call”. I was getting ready for school when the phone rang. When I answered I thought it would just be another of our regular phone calls, Valery rarely called my house but when she did it was to make me laugh or ask me about some other random thing about school, or gossip. Then it got dramatic, she told me to sit down and to stay calm. I laughed and told her to stop joking around. “Mataron a Nayeli” (Nayeli’s been murdered). I froze for a moment but it seemed like hours. Then I broke down, I just couldn’t believe it, I had just seen her at school. How was it possible!

We were all so happy, we were almost done with high school, she was so happy because she had gotten such good grades that bimester and she was going to apply for college. She had just told us a couple of weeks before that she was pregnant, and we were all so exited abut meeting our new “nephew”. We even gave him a nickname. And in the blink of an eye, it was over.

The days that came after that were the hardest. Those feeling of remorse and regret, sadness and pain were so new to most of us. At least for me they were, I had never lost someone so Important. At the wake all I can remember was tears, coffee and cigarettes. But in our little group of friends we started to remember her as the happy person she was, and we couldn’t help but smile and laugh. Laugh and cry at the same time, it was something I had never experienced before. It was painful but I just couldn’t help myself.

After it all happened we had a break from school because of Easter and stuff. It was the best for everyone I guess. During those few days I was restless. I couldn’t sleep.

Then she came to me in a dream, it was beautiful, and she helped me grieve. We were going to a party in a huge warehouse; there were thousands of people I presume. And there we were in some part of that huge party, my friends and I, all my friends except her. It seemed strange because she loved to party. At first I didn’t mind, but then it started to overwhelm me, the sea of people, the loud music, the darkness and the bright lights all at once. That’s when we saw her, and suddenly there was this sense of peace, everything went quiet and we were surrounded by a bright light that feel so warm, and she was happy, which was no surprise. And then she spoke, but her words I can’t remember. Whatever she said I made me feel calm and at peace.

I miss her, I imagine we all do, and hopefully we will get to see her again. In the meantime, reminiscing the happy times where we would laugh about nonsense and talk about our futures and what we wanted to be. She was a pink and happy girl, and that is how I will always remember her.

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